Tre heads back to FAU for Fall semester tomorrow. So yesterday when he wanted me to watch a YouTube video of bodybuilding legend and eight-time Mr. Olympia winner, Ronnie Coleman, I didn't ask questions.  While Tre was locked in on Coleman's freakish strength, I was locked in on something he kept repeating. 

“Everybody wants to be a bodybuilder,

but nobody wants to lift no heavy-ass weights.”

When the video ended I said, “I could play this word game all day.”

“Everybody wants to be an entrepreneur but no one wants to take the risk.” 

“Everyone wants to be fit but no one wants to start moving.

“Everyone wants to be an author but nobody wants to write 75,000 words.” 

“Everybody wants to be in love but nobody wants to work on themselves.” 

Here's what's been on my mind in the last 24 hrs.  Breakthroughs happen everyday; but they don't happen by...

Nell Derick Debevoise | Forbes Senior Contributor

Jes Averhart is a leadership expert and host of the Reinvention Road Trip Podcast and Virtual Summit. We talked about one of her foundational concepts for successful leadership in any role: the Say:Do ratio.

Nell Derick Debevoise: What is the Say:Do ratio?

Jes Averhart: It's simple. Do you do what you say you’re going to do? The Say:Do Ratio serves as a guide to an honest answer. We allude to it all the time in expressions like, “Talk is cheap,” “I'll believe it when I see it!” Or “All talk, no action.”

Trust of other people is at an all-time low in the US.

 PEW RESEARCH CENTER

The minute someone says something and doesn't do it, it can set off a negative chain reaction among the people on the other side of the deal. The Say:Do ratio is a useful expression and North Star for accountability. Once you know the term, you’ll see how...

Friends, we’re in the fire!  2020 is Hot. Pressurized. Dangerous.  I’ve been feeling it…you’ve been feeling it…the conditions have been met.  Will Krieger, VP Research America, Inc. defines a crucible moment as a transformative experience through which an individual comes to a new or an altered sense of identity.”  

Merriam-Webster defines a crucible as: cru·ci·ble \ \krü-sə-bəl\

1. a vessel used for melting a substance that requires a high degree of heat
2. a severe test
3. a place or situation in which concentrated forces interact to cause or influence change or development.

Crucible moments force us to withstand an extreme test; where the beauty lies in the process and the  possibilities. The possibility of something new, precious and more valuable being created in the belly of the fire.  Today, we’re going to get a glimpse at the “New Thing” we’re becoming.

The power...

“I got POWER, POISON, PAIN and JOY inside my DNA”*

Early last week, I announced that I would officially introduce my new venture.  June 1^st was supposed to be…the big reveal!  

Well, 8 minutes and 46 seconds changed all that.  

On Monday, my friends gathered six feet apart as planned, to raise a glass and asked, “Did we miss something? I didn’t see your announcement.”  My response was vague…littered with incomplete thoughts. 

Like most of the world, I had spent the last few days, internalizing the horrific footage of George Floyd’s murder and digesting the national headlines.  And, like most of Black America, I was also offering insights in response to my white friends’ questions and reflections.  Honestly, I barely realized that Monday had rolled around…the “launch” seemed inconsequential and tone deaf at best.  

Instead, June 1st looked like this.  In...

Ahhh yes, you've been soul searching and thinking about your next move?  

While everyone else has been researching where to buy toilet paper and theorizing if Carol really did kill her husband, you've used your "Stay at Home" order to evaluate your life, your work, your hobbies, your world...right?  

Welcome!  

Welcome to the sacred circle of contemplators, dreamers and wonderers. Think of this as the outer circle of a bullseye; it's the easy target...and it should be!  It's important to dream and dream often.  But how can you sharpen your aim and get serious about really living your dream - hitting the bullseye?  

If you're ready to take your life to the next level, these 5 quotes can prop you up along the way and remind you that YOU actually can do this!  You CAN do this!  You can DO this!   You can do THIS!  

Okay, you get the point!  Here are the 5 quotes I personally live by...they...

Oh, sweet marmalade, everyone's talking about impostor syndrome these days?  It’s the phrase that’s being thrown around right and left; but…what the heck is it, exactly? 

Well, it’s a feeling. Bottom line.  A feeling of being a fraud, despite evidence that indicates you’re skilled and capable.  If not put in check, Impostor Syndrome can drive you to make decisions that hold you back.  You see, impostor syndrome is sneaky and persuasive.  It has ways of convincing you that you aren’t good enough.  This tricky mindset can put the kibosh on the pursuit of your dream job, the start of that blog for millennials, or going after that new role in your department.   Yep, Impostor Syndrome is a feeling that if gone unchecked can wreak havoc on your life and have you doubting even the most logical next step.

 “Impostor syndrome causes negative stress, fear, anxiety, and loss of confidence,” says...

Weird Science to Iron Man…drug addiction to Hollywood’s most in-demand and highest paid actors.  Sound Familiar?  My pop culture mavens are screaming…that’s Robert Downey Jr.!!!

Yep, our very own Tony Stark took his personal reinvention to a Whole. Notha. Level off screen!   I loved the guy in Pretty in Pink and Charlie Chaplin, forgave him for Tropic Thunder and have him etched in time after the ending of Avengers - Endgame.  But it was those middle years that I held my breath as a fan.  In between 1996 to 2001, he unquestionably played the role of a lifetime.  Downey played himself.  He sped down a road that included drug addition, rehab, jail, a tanking career and eventually self-discovery and ultimately recovery.

I was nine years old when Weird Science came out.  I remember really wanting Ian, the preppy bully that Downey played in the film to get what was coming to him.  Payback, ya know? And of course,...

So…the last time I blogged was about 5 years ago.  My son, now a Senior in High School, was playing Pop Warner football at the time.  Now,  if you’re familiar with Pop Warner you know that the dreams of young boys are held within their coaches Saturday morning  playbook.  While the boys are on the field learning how to take a “dressing down” from their position coach and not cry, the parents (mostly moms) are on the sidelines “catching up” and trying to pretend they don’t hear the barks and orders  being shouted in the distance.   It was during one of these chat sessions that a mom said…”you have the best dating stories…you should start a blog.” So, with a choir of football moms encouraging me to write, I did.  

Not surprisingly, it didn’t last long.  I discovered that writing about your dating life is like traveling across country in a station wagon;...